Poem

Sedated

I remember
White walls
Brick and mortar, plaster and paint
I used to stare
Splash a little
Colour
Around in my head
Stain them scarlet red
Most of the time
Some days scarred black
They always seep back into the cracks
And leave me
Fading, falling into oblivion

Always

I avoid cold glass
Because
Seeing
Parallel, empty copies of me
(Or am I the one that's empty?)
Scares me
More than I like

To admit

That
A wraith
Haunts every breath
And every damn step
Closer to you
That

I take

Too much
Sometimes, I suck
You bone dry
I break your brittle
Fragile paper body
Puncture your
Pretty organs
I play with your
Sick brain
Corrupt it
A little more
Each time I leave you
Stranded deeper
In

The dark

Is generous
It takes away pain
It hides secrets
It distorts the truth
Keeps the fear
Cemented six feet under
With things
Long dead and nightmares

Unseen

Hands
Hold me down
Strap me tight
To my gurney
I resist, for awhile
Just to keep
Things interesting
They tell me
To behave
So that I will get better
"It won't hurt"
No, it doesn't
Or at least, they make me believe
That it won't

But
I'm back
To white walls
Iron, metal
Dig into my mortal
Flesh
They sting, and run
The brightest ruby river

So
This time
I add, I give them
More shades

Of red.

Vivian Cheah (4 Dickens)