When you touch the wings of a butterfly, you claw at the scales of its wings. This permanent damage prevents it from flying and, ultimately, it dies. So would you risk the death of a beautiful creature, or could you sit back, and just admire it from a distance, far enough for you to do it any harm? This was the starting point for one of my earlier philosophical discussions about human attraction, which I called “The Butterfly Theory”.
Imagine if people were butterflies. Imagine the person you are currently attracted to, as a butterfly. This philosophical view suggests that your presence, or interaction, may cause harm to the person you are attracted to. And so, for you to continue appreciating someone’s existence, you would have to maintain a distance, keep them safe from the harm that is You.
But what do you get out of being attracted to someone who you can’t perceive to be attracted to you? What benefit does being unrequited give you? This was (for lack of a better word) a turning point in my theory, which I have developed to suggest you can be selfish and selfless at the same time.
In my opinion, the entire experience revolves around your feelings. You have feelings for someone, not because you want them to feel the same, but because you want to feel that way, objectively, unbiased. You gain self-satisfaction in experiencing the emotion itself. What they feel about you would not have to matter. In that sense, what you feel is entirely selfish.
However, does this not contradict “The Butterfly Theory”? We are now trapped in a paradox. You stay away from someone you have feelings for, because you care for them. And sadly, all you can savor is that sensation of butterflies in your stomach. If you believe in this idea of mine, then are you not selfish and selfless?
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